The Love That Crosses Reality
by Autumn Xavier
Summary: My take on all the horrible stories and MarySue fics. Worth reading. I promise....Flame, Review, Laugh. I don't care...I just want to read good fics.


_**Author's Note:** I would like to take this short little bit of time to state that I normally do not write such complete shit like this. This is pretty much a rant fic, where I make fun of all the crap I hate about people on and their horrid stories. Be forewarned that there will be:_

_**Continuous Spelling and Grammar Errors, Excessive OCC and Mary-Sue ness, Songfics that Really Have Nothing to do with the Story, Lack of Detail, and other such things..**_

_I hope you enjoy reading this as much as I had writing it because I really do hate like 70 of the stuff on this frelling site....if you know of any stories that are actually worth my time reading, please link or email them to me. I would love to read something decent for a change. Let the horrible writing begin!!!_

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**The Love that Crossed Reality!!!**

The day was brighte ajnd the sun was shining brightly. Jennifer was walking to school, wearing her traditional Japanase school girl unifrom. Her long, shoulde length black hair flowed behind her as she sung a little song that suited her mood.

_One Little Spark_

_Of Inspiraiton_

_Is at the heart_

_Of all creation_

Suddenly, a gaint monster jumped out and attacked her. "Oh no! Someone help me! I am a weak, little girl that has secret powers that I don't know about so I need some magical mystery man from another world to come and svae me!!!!" She screamed, dropping her bags. The monster growled and jumped at her, scratching her with it's large claws.

Just as the monster was about to eat her, a sharp arrow pirced through it's heart, killing it instantly. Jennifer turned and looked to her rescuer, a beautiful tall blond elf. He was like nothing she had ever seen before. He was blond and was 6'5 and was extremly built.

"Hello there. My name is Legolas. Are you okay?"

"Yes, I'm fine, my name is Jennifer. Pleased to meet you," she said. She smiled. The elf gasped for she was a beautful as the sun on a scorching hot Florida day in the middle of July. He knew he had to marry her for no one was as beautiful as he.

"You are as beautful as the sun on a scorching hot Florida day in the middle of July! I must have you as my wife! Come back to my father's castle in the sky (_wait...this is kinda like my other fic....hmm..maybe I should stop while I'm ahead....oh wait...nevermind...my character has a complete, detailed biography that goes into extensive detail..._) And I will make you my bride!!!" Legolas yelled, grasping the girl's hand and taking her onto his horse's back.

"Oh Legolas! I would love to but I have to go to sachool or I'll be late!"

"School, what is this school you speak of?! You are here, in Middle Earth! There is no such villian here as school. And if there were, I would defeat it for you so you would never have to worry about it again and bear me many children!"

"Oh Legolas! I love you!" She said, as she kissed his tasty lips. And that was the beginning of something new.

_Right at the start _

_Of everything that's new_

_One little spark_

_Lights up for you_

They rode through the forest. Jennifer looked at the strange world around her. A tiny river ran nearby them. Oh how wonderful it would be to take a shower there. It must have been so long since she last had one (_we'll ignore the fact that she had one right before she left for school that morning)_. "Legolas? May we stop for a moment? I would like to take a bath before I go to meet your father."

"Of course, my love. You may have anythign you're heart desires," he said, helping her dismount. Jennifer smiled and disappeared into the slightly wooded surrounding. Legolas sighed and looked to the sky, his heart racing. "Ah, what I fairest maiden hath I found! The world should be jealous of my extreme beauty and my good fortunes. She is far more beautiful that that stupid girl Aragorn married!"

_Two tiny wings_

_Eyes big and yellow_

_Horns of a Steer_

_What a lovable fellow_

_From Head to Tail_

_She's royal purple pigment_

_And there – Viola!_

_You've got a Figment!_

_A Figment of Imagination!!_

Jennifer slowly walked down the gravel path to the river. She took off her clothes. And touched her toe to the water. It was warm. She jumped in. It was refreshing. She sgihed with relief. "Ahhh, this feels good! I hope nothing disturbs me while I am relaxing. And what luck I have at meeting such a wonderful, mystery man who saved me."

She resteded her head on a rock in the middle of the lake. A waterful was falling nearby, blocking all sounds from being heard. Even the battle cries of the demon mice that were attacking her. Jennifer looked up and let out a blood curdling scream that could only be heard to any elves in the area.

_So many times_

_We're stumbling in the dark_

_And then – Eureka!_

_What a spark!_

_How are we going to use lightening?_

_We can cobine it with ghostly shivers_

_On a stormy night_

_And then turn it into_

_A tale of fright!_

Legolas looked up, senseing that something was wrong with his beloved! "Oh no! My beloved is in trouble! I must go and save her just in time to discover her new powers that could only be reveled once she came to Middle Earth!"

He ran to the river just as Jennifer let our a blast of energy that destroyed all the demon rats. Somehow the enegey had not effecte Legolas even though all the rat around him where now deader than dorrnails. He stood there, amazed even more at his beloved. "Wow! That was amazing, my beloved! How did you learn this new powers of yours?"

"I guess it was always a part of me, I just had to come to the right place to unlease it. I think my grandmother was once a Elven maiden from this place, even though we lived in Japan. I'm also half vampire, half werewolf, half Hobbit, half demon, half witch, half wizard, half orc, half human, and half mutant. I also have no weaknesses against any kind of attack now that I have learned my full power."

Legolas nodded and smiled. He noticed she was not dressed. "Oh no. How did I not notice you did not have clothes on! How embarassing!" He said, turning his head. Jennifer smiled and took his hand, holding it in hers.

"It's okay. We're going to get married soon and live happily ever after so why don't you get to see me naked? Let's make love right here as a reward for saving me even though I saved myself!" Jennifer said. She kissed him and they fell to the ground.

_What about science?_

_Science? We need...._

_Electron beams and Crystal Prisms_

_Gyroscopes and Magnetisms!_

_Hold on Figment, the dreambag is full._

_It is? **THEN LET"S START MAKING NEW THINGS!!!!!!!!!!!! (HINT HINT HINT HINT)**_

After a few hours of love making, the got up. "It's getting late, we should head back top the castle. My father is probably anxious to meet you," Legolas said, dressing himself.

Jennifer also got dressed, now wearing a traditional Elven dress. Her hair was longer now that she had gotten more power made a beautiful array of braid on top of her head. "Okay, let's go. I can teleport us there with my new powers."

"Teleport? Really? Then let us go together then." Legolas said. There was a breight flash and the two of them left the area. They reappeared in the middle of Thranduil's castle.

"Wow this is really pretyy! I didn't know you lived so richly! Are you a prince?" Jennifer said, taking in all the excitement.

"Of course, how else would I have such nice clothes. And only you, a complete stranger from another world could be my queen! Come, let us be married!" Legolas said.

"That would be great! I would love to be your wife (_although we just met and I am using you to gain better status in the new land_)"

Later that day, the sun set and the wedding went of. Legolas and Jennifer got married. Thery lived happily ever and they had 800,000 million Elven children since Jennifer was a now an Elven maiden because of her father's mother sister cousin second best friend's dog's puppies sisters owner's brother in law's fourth great grand daughter on their mother's side, twice removed was an Elven maiden known as Arwen.

**The end.**

_We all have spark_

_Imaginations_

_That's how our minds_

_Create Creations_

_Right at the start_

_Of everything that's new_

_One Little Spark_

_Lights up for you_

_Imagination_

_Imagination_

_A dream can be a dream come true_

_With just that spark_

_In me and you!!_

_**AN: **Maybe next time you people will listen to me when I review your crap ass stories and actually use things like spelling and grammar checking, and not use song lyrics in stories....I don't care if I get flamed for this because I understand it is crap. That was intentional. Review, don't review....I don't care at this point. I just want to read decent fanfiction on here. QUALITY CONTROL BITCHES!!!!_


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